Day 3
Helsinki Finland
It was part of Sweden for a while and part of Russia for a while and now it’s Finland, except they call themselves Soumi. I’d be pissed if someone just made up a name for me and ran around making everyone else use it. Like if you introduce yourself as Richard but then some asshat insists on calling you Dick. And makes all his friends call you Ricky.
Unless it was a really, really amazing name. And it could be my alias, my code name, like when I was a little kid and my neighbor called me ‘Cougar’ and since that was the coolest animal in the world aside from my invisible pet alligator named Spike, I spent a lot of time writing my code name on slips of paper and in notebooks – getting my cursive just right.
Finland’s disparity between the rich and the poor is the lowest in the world. And they ranked first in the World Happiness Report. Not many people seemed out and about during our bus tour, but on Saturdays maybe they all just hang out in their pajamas at home. Being all super happy and spending quality time with the ones they love and eating orange cinnamon rolls with icing on top.
The bus was super hot, and the air couldn’t seem to work in the back where we were sitting. We sweated away, listening to the tour guide’s monotone voice about sports and hockey and their petty rivalry with Sweden.
How red is my face? mom asked.
I slipped in and out of sleep on the bus, trying my hardest to concentrate on the guy. But Finland couldn’t live up to Sweden and neither could this tour live up to the last and anyway, I had a terrible night last night, suffering immensely from lack of sleep.
We passed construction sites where the workers stayed on site every day and lived in shipping containers stacked on top of one another. Simple and efficient.
This whole place is simple and efficient. And happy.
And they can keep it. I’m going to Sweden.
–Cougar