Patented Relay System

Day 57

PCT Mile Marker 1716.19 – 1716.19

Miles Hiked 0

Shamelessly, we snuck me into the breakfast buffet at Michelle and Leland’s swanky hotel. Then we sat in the hot tub for while. Then the pool. Then the hot tub.

Then, unfortunately, they had to head home. I walked back to my motel and waved at the homeless person who was camped in the ditch by the gas station.

He waved back.

I told the lady at the motel that the a/c wasn’t working in my room so it was pretty hot in there all night. I didn’t tell her that the restaurant/bar had patrons running around the parking lot screaming at two o’clock in the morning. I figured that probably happens all the time.

Motel Lady: “You have to push the blue arrow down to change the temperature. Otherwise the air conditioning will turn itself off when it reaches the temperature indicated on the screen. That’s probably all that happened.”

Me: “Um, no…so I understand how it works, but the problem is that it didn’t work. I even re-set it. Nothing.”

She promised they’d look into it.

So I decided to go shopping. I needed to get groceries for pretty much the entire state of Oregon and mail them to myself. Some locals told me to go to the Shop N’ Karry. That is was cheaper than Albertsons.

Albertson’s was literally next door to the motel, but the Shop N’ Karry was only a block and a half away, so I headed over.

How do you shop for three weeks-ish worth of food?  

I went to the energy bar isle to start. I carefully picked out 36 single energy bars. Then I went to the next aisle and found there were tons of energy bars and stuff in boxes for way cheaper.

Instantly Overwhelmed.

I grabbed some boxes of bars and selected a bunch of single energy bars to put back. Then I turned into a bad person and just put a pile of single energy bars on a shelf.

After two hours, I hadn’t finished shopping, but I felt like I just couldn’t figure anything else out and I needed a break. I decided to go back to the motel for a few.

I piled all the food on the little moving walkway conveyor belt thing for checkout, and the gal asked if I needed any bags. Affirmative.

She indicated for me to grab some and I did. They had no handles. No handles? Since when do shopping bags have no handles? She indicated if I wanted handles, I’d have to buy reusable cloth bags.

Me: “I am afraid I have made a critical error.”

Clerk: “How’s that?”

Me: “I need to get all these groceries just over to that motel. You can almost see it if you look out the window.”

Clerk: “Oh no problem. You just make a quick call and they’ll help you get everything over to your room.” She tossed her head toward the back of the store. Or was she just flipping her hair out of her eyes?

Me (paying): “Okay, so who do I call?”

Clerk: “Your hotel! They have people to deal with your bags; I’m sure they’d help with your groceries too.”

What? Not this motel. I thought she meant someone from the store would help me.

OMG LOOK AT ALL THESE GROCERIES.

How was I going to get them back?

I stared at the words imprinted on the cart:

‘Oregon Shopping Cart Theft Law:’

Blah-blahblah-blah-bla-blahblah…

I stacked all the groceries into three heavy bags and stared at them for a while. Stacked two on top of each other and put the my other arm around the third. I crossed one quiet street and made it down to the stop light where I had to take a break.

All I had to do was get across that busy intersection and then figure out what to do next. I hit the crosswalk button and picked up my bags.

Easy does it. Focus on good grip, good steps, stability…

I slowly made my way across the intersection, feeling twenty sets of eyes on me. 

I made it!

I had to set the bags down. My arms limp noodles.  

Now what?

I picked up one bag, carried it fifty feet down the sidewalk. Put it down. Went back and got the other two bags, carried those past the first bag plus another fifty feet. Put those two down.  

Patented-Relay-System.

It took me a really long time, but I did eventually make it back to my room.

I dumped the bags out on the bed. So much food. So much to sort out.

I watched TV for fifteen minutes and ate hummus and chips.

The I went to Albertson’s and got the rest of the stuff I thought I needed.  

When I came back, there was Turtle!

Where ya been? He said. I’ve been looking for you for two days! Let’s have a beer.

So we sat in the doorway of my motel room, drinking beer and laughing at me and talking about where we were mailing our resupply boxes.

We went to the sushi place and had a couple of sushi rolls, and then I headed back to my room where I ate half a box of Lucky Charms for dessert and read the accompanying Batman V. Superman comic book that came in the cereal box.

And then the resupply sorting began…